It’s All Because of Football

I’ve been reading a lot lately about the problems that boys are having in school these days, and thinking about the ever growing challenge of keeping them in high school long enough to prepare them to get a college degree. Even in my nice middle class neighborhood, I know that many parents are struggling with their sons, and their lack of academic engagement. That’s why it was such a thrill to learn that the boy next door, who has for many years seemed uninterested in school, has just been accepted into a teacher education program at the University of Redlands.

I barely had time to offer my congratulations to his proud mom when she burst out … “it’s because of football you know.” For this young man, his heartfelt desire to play college football, and the academic requirements he needed to fulfill in order to play in high school resulted in a commitment to his schoolwork, a college acceptance, and, according to his parents, a completely changed attitude, at school and at home. It took a lot of work, and cooperation between home and school, but the outcome is what we all hope for.

A number of the things that worked for my neighbor can be integrated seamlessly into the lists of suggestions in this blog and lots of other resources, about how to create a “boy-friendly school.” In my opinion, the key to making a difference is encouraging boys to read. To do this, it certainly helps to provide them with access to books, articles and stories that provide masculine themes and role models and topics that interest them – starting with sports.

To encourage more reading (and all the good things that results from that) make sure that all your students have easy access to sports magazines, adventure stories and biographies of sports figures. Whether it’s a story of conquering Everest, or winning the Super Bowl, research shows that boys like stories about overcoming a challenge.

So do I; stories about boys getting through high school and into college are just the kind of challenge I’d like to read more about.

Why Do Students Drop Out of School?

When asked this question, most people assume that kids drop out of school because they can’t handle the coursework. In fact, only about 35% of dropouts quit school because it’s too hard.

Some people think that kids drop out because they hate school – and feel alienated. That may be true for some kids, but the fact is, there is no “typical” dropout.

The reasons kids drop out of school are as complex and varied as their faces and their personal situations.
Here’s a list of some of the reasons kids drop out:

• Family trouble; poverty, violence, drugs, alcohol, too many responsibilities, needing to work and support family members.

• A family that moves a lot, especially in the city, so that the kid is forced to change schools often.

• Teen pregnancy.

• A bad attitude about school.

• The belief (not always inaccurate) that school is meaningless and irrelevant.

• Teachers and others who offer no help or support.

• Poor grades, failing, being held back a grade.

• Lack of involvement or motivation.

• Harsh discipline, suspension, probation for bad behavior.

• A difficult transition to ninth grade. (or fifth or third grade – yes the problem can start that early)

• Parents who are uninvolved, and negative about school

• Poor or no communication with families and support people.

• Absenteeism, consistent lateness and cutting class.

• Negative friendships with gangs or kids who hate school.

• Disregard for special needs, unrecognized talents, unencouraged abilities.

• Feeling like an outsider because of a learning disability or physical or other difference.

• Unacknowledged and sometimes untolerated language and cultural differences. It’s hard to learn in a situation where everyone is expected to share the same beliefs and learn in the same way.

Though this long list still doesn’t address all the potential risk factors, its important to keep in mind that sometimes the most unlikely kids succeed, and equally important, sometimes, the one who seems the most promising drops out.

Why? We think we may know.

Research has shown that no matter the situation, whether boy or girl, struggling student or gifted one, child from poverty or wealth, no matter the reason why they drop out, the reason kids stay in school is simple.

If they are going to stay in school and succeed in life, all kids need the same thing - All kids need strong, supportive relationships.

In fact, research shows that good relationships between kids at-risk and their teachers and/or mentors may significantly increase the chance that the student will not only stay in school, but increase their level of success throughout life.

Seems simple doesn't it? Yet forming strong relationships with kids can be one of the biggest challenges an educator or mentor can face. It takes heart and mind, and some creativity. How do you form strong relationships? What has NOT worked.

In the next post I will provide a surprisingly simple idea that does work, and takes no extra time or preparation.

Where are the Role Models?

Sometimes questions seem to pop up in several places at the same time. I had a great conversation at Portland State University about the problems that kids have after they graduate (after all the effort to help them NOT DROP OUT). My companion pointed out that (based on her personal experience as well as research) even when they make it through school, some kids find themselves unable to continue to college.

There are many reasons that kids don’t go on to college; financial reasons, or family responsibilities for example. But for some, even if they are able to attend, they don’t go on to college because they simply have no idea what they might be or do if they get there.

This topic also frequently came up in a course I developed and taught, Making Connections, Strong Relationships Help Keep Kids in School . My students (teachers and mentors) wondered how to keep the students who make it through school connected – with learning, with work, and with the desire and inspiration to continue to move forward in their lives. There was lots of conversation about how to inspire the kids who are currently in school (at every grade) with the idea that if they STAY in school – they can go on after school to do something they love, or at least, are interested in.

The one question that was common to every discussion is this - where are the role models? How can teachers and mentors connect their kids with people of every color and kind - who can demonstrate by their simple presence, that there is a place in the world of work for people of every description?

A student expressed it perfectly. “What I want to work on this year is introducing the kids to some successful minority community members. I am thinking about how I can do this in the most effective way, because I want my kids to get to know (and see) business people, doctors, scientists, lawyers, dentists, college professors, business owners, financial planners, engineers, and the like. I want my kids to know that there are more possibilities for them besides being a teacher, working in a factory, in construction, or selling drugs. I really believe that the students need to see successful people who look like them.”

I agree that this is an important issue, so I am including some ideas that teachers and mentors can use to think creatively about find interesting people who do interesting things. I hope that readers will add to my list, even add specifics. If you would like to volunteer to share your experiences with work and school, please post your information and ideas to this blog.

• Start by connecting with local business organizations and the people you know. Contact the Chamber of Commerce in your community (there are many in Metro Oregon.) Most have administrative people who can make suggestions and connections.

• Talk to your friends and colleagues who do interesting work, and have interesting hobbies and sidelines. Ask them to talk to your kids about the things they needed to learn in school to be able to do what they do now.

• Ask these same people about the people they know. Build a list - think of this as your personal backpack of connections.

• Seek out people who do interesting or valuable things - who have NOT gone through the traditional college path - but needed to learn skills to do their work.
• Read the newspaper – this can be a great activity for students. Ask each student to find a story about someone who does something that is interesting to them (mountain rescuers, firefighters, soldiers, artists having an opening show, dancers, photographers, lawyers who win a case, doctors, veterinarians at the zoo …. the possibilities are endless. These articles are useful in several ways – it allows you to build a list of jobs that people do, it lets you get to know your kids a little better, it provides names and organizations connected with the work that people actually do, and, at times, contact information. Use this list to start thinking creatively with your students about ways to invite people to come to your classroom, program or school.
And then there is the serendipity approach. This story, my own experience, shows that just the right thing can happen when you are busy doing something else.
Years ago, I was a teacher in the Talented and Gifted program - working with kids of many colors. One African American girl seemed shy and was having a hard time connecting with the class. I tried everything I knew to connect with her and draw her out - with minimal results … until …We were doing a unit on whales, and the kids had invited a speaker to come from Greenpeace to talk to them - purely randomly, a young black woman came into the classroom. My student literally snapped to attention - she was riveted by this woman. She spoke in class, asked questions and displayed a great sense of humor. What a difference! Long story short the changes stayed. She was a new girl - bright, involved and far more confident. When I asked her at the end of the term what she wanted to be - she (who in the beginning wanted to ‘have no responsibilities’) wanted to be a Marine biologist.

So, I believe the key to finding role models may not be to look for people who fit a description, but to keep your classroom and program open to the many people who may be part of your community. Trust that color is not the only diversity your kids need to see, and that the perfect role model may look different, but still bring that perfect something into the life of a kid, without YOU needing so hard to make things happen. Present as many possibilities as you can, as you go through your classwork and activities, and trust that the details will take care of themselves.